I have a problem

Sometimes, I'm just not a motivated person. Take today, for example. I am all alone in the office. Now, granted, there are only two of us on a normal day, but being here by myself is just plain boring. Sure, there's work I could be doing, yet I choose not to. And not for any decent reason, it's just because I'm feeling tired and lazy and there's no one here to notice. Isn't that terrible? I feel like I should be much more driven at the moment, this being a new job and all, but the reality is that it's summer and there's plenty of time to finish the things I need to have done before the end of August. I don't have enough of a sense for the job to start initiating new things, yet, and quite frankly, even if I did, at this moment, I don't think I would be motivated enough to start brainstorming projects. Hmmm. I am a slacker. I need to be much better about actually working when I'm at work and no one's here.

On a more positive note, I ran into some students on campus today. Yay! I guess they're technically my former students, but it was still great to see them. There's a group of them here taking a class in a pre-college summer program. It's fun to see them on campus--it's like a glimpse of what's to come when they graduate next spring. I gave them my phone number, they promised to visit me at my office, and I promised to track them down again sometime this week (seeing as how they're the ones busy with classes and such and I'm just a slacker).

Why am I so tired? My boyfriend, a teacher 9 months of the year, is driving a bread truck for a little extra cash this month. He works crazy hours with little sleep. Needeless to say, finding time to spend together has been a little challenging, so I decided to spend some quality time riding in the truck with him this weekend. I am impressed that I got up at 3:00 a.m. Saturday morning to do this. Then we spent the next 10 hours delivering a lot of bread. I have a renewed respect for the people who do this for a living because I could not. The hours alone would drive me crazy. I'm sure I'd eventually adapt and adjust, but man it would be tough.

On Sunday I brought him home to meet the parents. It was fun, and good to let my parents finally put a face with the name they hear so often. It was a quick visit--just a few hours, which I think is a good amount of time for that first meeting. I think it eases the potential stress. It's strange, though; for the first time ever, I wasn't stressed about my parents meeting a boyfriend. It's a nice change.

The first of my friends who are relocating this summer left last week. It doesn't feel like she's actually gone, yet. When the school year ended we all got so crazy busy, and since lately most of our communication has been by phone, not much has changed. I'm expecting it to hit me when I meet her landlord to sign the lease for her apartment tonight. I'm excited I can move into a place that holds a lot of memories for me, with neighbors I already know, but it won't be the same without her there. I'm not looking forward to seeing her empty apartment, either. I've been bracing myself for this summer for a while, now. I'm glad I have this new job to focus on (and I do focus on most days...just not today), and the pets I'm taking care of this summer definitely keep me on the move, but I'm worried about how difficult it might be in August, when everyone is gone. Enough on that for now, though. Actually, I'm going to try to get some actual work done before the end of the day. Tomorrow I will NOT be such a slacker. I swear.